continued from last post…
Objects in the Field can also be the legacy of familial violence, sexual abuse, addiction, emotional unavailability — incidents and habits that likely originated in personal hardships, and were fortified by cultural norms. The continual presence of these habits in the Family Field can influence how babies are conceived, how they are born, and how they develop their sense of self. We can look at how these same influences persist throughout life and shape behaviour in children and adults.
We, as adults, both male and female, bring children into the world in a way similar to the way in which we were brought. Everything, from how we were thought of before we were conceived to the way we were born and nurtured, shapes our understanding of how things should be. For example, your family may have had a positive view of raising a family, so when you were conceived, you were welcomed into a ready and willing family. Those circumstances continue to shape you today, mentally and physically. Or your parents may have been living in circumstances that challenged their ability to celebrate your arrival and support you along your way. They might have been living with poverty, recent immigration, nutritional deficits, unaddressed sexual or physical abuse, or addictions. Even though it was a long time ago, it is your responsibility as a parent and an adult to become aware of possible influences from your past. You cannot change history, but if you are able to differentiate these past Objects in the Field from your own sense of self, you, or you and your child, can create a future that’s more defined by what you want in your life.
As you work with the Family Field, you will look back through your first experiences, your parents’ early experiences, and, possibly, your ancestors’ experiences. You will quickly realize that using this perspective takes the pressure off babies and mothers, who are often seen as exclusively responsible for pre-birth and birth challenges.
We, or our children and grandchildren, are the latest buds on a long vine. If we’re blessed, that vine is intact. More often, though, the vine has been tangled or withered, even severed in places or, for reasons already mentioned, has not thrived. Old cultures have ways of remembering the dead and do so regularly. In technologically advanced societies we sometimes know the names and stories of our ancestors, but often they are people we’ve never heard of or thought about. Still, it is surprising how many people have an awareness that a dead relative “has been with them,” or feel they are “finishing something” for a relative they don’t know.
When I’m working with an unsettled baby or child, occasionally an image of an elderly person, who is seemingly from a different time period, comes to my attention. If that happens, I ask the parents if there is an ancestor who might have a connection to what’s happening in front of us. I try not to lead with any suggestions of age, appearance, or even gender, so that parents will trust their own instincts. Often the child will relax when the ancestor is contemplated. Children are important mirrors for the Family Field, and it’s frequently through them that Objects in the Field are revealed. For that reason, babies are some of the most important translators in our societies. Decoding their language is an essential step to restoring humanity where it is missing. The love you give, and the healing you do with, yourself and your babies redeems past, present, and, of course, future generations.
In my book, It’s Never Too Late: Healing Rebirth and Birth At Any Age, I take readers through an inquiry that maps possibly ancestral imprints from their family field.
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